waiting to understand

This deep deep truth a rooted knowing that to pray for you would free me to pray for you would stop opening this old wound again and again would take the sting from my memories would break chains and allow me to really breathe again because in my spiritual life I am holding my breath unable to really move forward choking on the pain and the hurt and the loss and the anger all vines, wound too tight around my heart a constant string around my finger a reminder to forgive you to let you go from this cage where I have locked you up for hurting me and paced in front of it for what feels like decades nothing good comes from holding you there because sadly it holds ME there so I end up dwelling in a place I never wanted lurking in a past that keeps me hurting...wallowing like trying to hold a crow that keeps pecking your hand why would you let it make wounds when you could release it? Oh wretched heart that doesn't know what to do that doesn'...

Bright blond hair blue eyes and fair but tan in summer if you must know your share of random personal facts and She cares too much and she cannot be convinced that she should watch the news (truth can't be minced) and you can woo her with lies because she knows the things she likes to hear but she can see it in your eyes if you really love, if she is dear She likes to collect nudes but is too shy to be naked, listens to the roar of the ocean and wonders at how it never stops and never tires... She watches her children sleep and then takes countless pictures from all angles and stays up far too late writing these words copied from handwritten pages. ~C

Chances squandered opportunities lost like potential trapped within you bored with the waiting wondering if it will ever be never being able to breathe or step outside of you to see it's reality it's possibility This dream you think of everyday but never allow to come out to play That lurks in the shadows of who you could be and plays peek a boo with all that you "should" be Two voices war... one wanting the best for you The other trying to get the best OF you, that voice is trying to waste time to distract you to get you to burn out And the other, that one that wants the best it fights for NOW for you to take the steps now that will open the doors of later that will open the windows that let all the light in that will shine all over your future And you get to decide who wins out you get to foster hope or retire to sighing you get to dig deep and push or watch it slip away from you from a distance That lady that started as the s...

Get out of your head stop analyzing let go and don't strategically plan your every move wing it just for today and make it up as you go along let the wind take you where it will don't do anything you normally do think outside the box open the box and get out! run with it go with it go with the flow end up somewhere unexpected somewhere different somewhere amazing stop texting and look up look around you don't let life pass you by smell those roses notice those white fluffy clouds those bright "hello" faces be alive within your life and try not to blink it will be gone in a FLASH. ~C