I always considered myself a pretty patient person. Much more so with people...
If a machine jams or a computer deletes what I am writing and I can't get it back....well then I start gnashing my teeth at it and huffing and puffing.
People, at least, I can try to reason with.
So patience is a tricky thing, because it can get irritating, being patient, and sometimes it can leave you lonely but it can also make you feel proud that you are able to keep it up too. I am trying to become a MASTER at not complaining while being patient.
You know those people in line at Disney World when you are in the kind of line you cannot get out of easily and you are too far away from the beginning but quite a ways from the end and they start griping....well it is understandable sure.....they investmented a lot of their time and now they feel stuck and to turn back now would be such a waste, and they really want to ride the amazing ride! (This is totally an analogy for my life if you haven't caught on by now.)
But my point is that these people that start to complain aloud in the line....
I DON'T WANT TO BE THAT PERSON!
Do they do it for attention? Do they do it because the wait has become too great and their annoyance is so irritating that they MUST express it? Do they need sympathy or an irritated buddy? I am sure all of the above. Do I need these things as well to get me through this patient time in my life?
I catch myself teetering on the brink of being one of these people.
One of these people I do not want to be,
because of my impatience with my patience.
Part of me is amazed I am able to be patient for so long now, and the other part of me knows I have no choice because love is involved, and when love is involved you don't just start griping in line right away....you are aware of how great the ride was the last time....and you are willing to put up with a lot to get there.
and you don't even consider back tracking through the line and saying excuse me 50,000 times and risk looking like you are TOO SCARED to ride the ride.....
because you know you are not scared and you know you are willing to wait....
you are just weary in the waiting...and it is getting the better of your measure of patience.
Oh my gosh, am I griping? :)