waiting to understand

to me it is like standing cemented to the floor in the middle of a house that is under water and all at once the windows are opened flooding the reality you once knew and you know you are going to drown and die to what was life as you know it will be different ~C

That is such a *SIGN* that in 2009 I wrote 55 blogs. I did not do it intentionally or even knowingly on any level! SOOOOOO COOOOOOOL ! keep dropping hints God, this is fun! -C

Find your own way and I'll find mine and with me, I prefer to walk with God He knows the best route to where I am going but the moment I start trying to give you my advice I should drop it because my advice is for ME not you everything I derive my advice from came from a whole string of things experiences and feelings and brokenness that happened to ME YOU have your own best interests that only YOU know, and God, if you involve Him find your own way and I will not push you or hurry you or shake my head at your choices I will not worry my hands over your decisions or sigh a great heaving sigh over the fact that you just don't get it or that I really think you are a glutton for punishment or that you are just too nice I know you won't do anything until YOU are ready You won't budge until YOU have had enough and only YOU knows how much that really is SO I trust you I trust that you know yourself that you believe in yourself that you are on YOUR right path with GOD and who ...

There is so much information and detail that goes into one relationship. Not only that but the details are constantly changing, or at least the circumstances. So something that worked yesterday suddenly feels off today....and it's not like you want it to. Relationship is hard enough without being romantic. I say hard but it is fairly easy for me to have a good relationship /friendship. Hard in the sense that being in love complicates it and there is always this looming chance that someone might get hurt. That part sucks. So forgive me for hurting you because I never meant to, and I know you know my heart. Saying goodbye ahead of time doesn't help prepare you for the actual end. For the record. It still feels like it is hanging there and awkward....and a friendship to replace the love would be awkward, with a hello and a how are ya, but always skirting around the love lost and thinking back to when it was all right on. yeah, awkward. I still pray for the best for you though. Sti...