Men & Women

I have this theory...
We were designed to function a certain way.
If we studied that way and aimed to emulate it we might be better off, but we are creatures of design, we like to one-up each other and constantly "improve" things.
So in the case of men and women for instance, the man was meant to lead.
The woman is the help mate.
We have totally obscured this set up.
Men have abused their role of authority, women have embraced feminism.
Men that have been burned by women decide to stay single forever and forgo having a help mate because freedom is safer, whatever the cost.
Women that have been burned raise their daughters to be completely independent so they never have to depend on a man.
This new self sufficient independent woman becomes the norm.
How many marriages and families have you seen where the woman wears the pants?
I don't think they were ever meant to!
The situation has been distorted.
The really weird offspring of these circumstances is that it creates a man that seeks out that independent woman...He thinks this is more attractive because she pulls her own weight and shares the responsibility. But it also places her on an equal footing and there is more head butting, her say is as powerful as your say. There is no leader. No initiative to lead the family in the way it was designed.
Men crave respect, they were built to receive it and now they are having to share that respect. Every decision they make can be trumped or challenged instead of discussed and pondered with the one there to help them.
Women were not meant to be submissive in the way humans distort these words of the Bible. We aren't whipping posts. But we weren't meant to be self sufficient either. If we grow up learning only to depend on ourselves, how will we ever trust? How will we really be able to respect authority?
There is this constant tension created as we hold ourselves to a twisted standard that was not designed by God, but designed out of fear and bitterness, worry and insecurity.
I have an old fashioned heart, not because I lack ambition or fear hard work.
I value the job that is done at HOME, the job no one seems to want to do anymore!
The more we complicate life, the more we work, the more we buy....they are all a gigantic animal that has to be fed, and as it grows it eats more and more. The more it grows, the more it takes away from the original design, takes away from family and true relationship, takes away from looking each other in the eye. It is a vicious cycle that we create on our own and it all boils down to priorities that have been mixed with our short comings and wounds. Mix it all up and you have a recipe for disaster, worse yet, divorce. When will we ever learn?
Only when we are given the revelation to open the eyes of our hearts will we realize how much more powerful it is to operate out of love and trust and surrender.
Better to operate in those and be burned , then to operate out of fear and skepticism and be destroyed.
The foundation we build upon is the same foundation that we will be rebuilding upon in times of destruction or disillusion. If the very foundation is built upon the things that bring us down like fear and insecurity...then those things will literally topple when our house does. We stand to truly hit bottom in all meaning of those words.

Start with you. Go deep. clean house.
Dig down to your roots and see why you believe what you do,
why you DO what you do,
why you love and value what you do,
why are the priorities you have your priorities,
and why did you decide those things were the most important?
Are they effecting your life in a powerful meaningful positive way?
and if not REVAMP!
Life is too short to perpetuate the same message of doom into your life!
Start now!

and only then...after you've cleaned up your own crap, can you have anything truly to offer another, especially in a love relationship. If you are whole and at peace, you have so much to give, so much to offer the foundation. My prayer is that the person you find has also searched thyself and cleaned house.
Only then are you two full halves that can make a full whole.
And then God seals the deal, and I guarantee if you follow HIS lead on how a marriage should function, you will be pleased, at peace, and functioning in a way that reeks with benefits and love sweet love. :)

~C


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