Mind Garden

my mind is a garden

where I have planted many things

where you have also planted

you have a section to the far back left

and all the things you planted

they are not all daisies

and buttercups

there are those thorny weeds

the ones that cut me

and no matter how I try to cut them back

they seem determined to choke out

the parts of the garden full of color and life

each memory a petal on a flower of love

you once showed me

blooming for a time and then gone

for a winter

and then back again when I least expect it

and that goes for the weeds too

things remembered

and the thorns with it

and with those memories

not the same first pain

but pain born from its generations before

of seasons long ago

when you first planted it here

God

the great gardener

not only knows how to tend

but designed every species

designed every weed

has an understanding of the mix

far greater and beyond me

so I trust him to tell me what to weed out

and there are times He has me just sitting

just taking in the beauty of a new unfolding flower

and there are times

that he asks me

to take a hold of the thorniest of weeds

and pull

and fight

and struggle

to get it up

to get it out

such a complicated garden

a spot for everyone that has touched my mind

with their influence

with their thoughts

with every word they said

every compliment

every insult too

a seed that was planted in their plot

in their section

of my garden

and some days I don't feel that I ever have enough time

to weed fast enough

or choose wisely enough

which weeds should be dug out first

I rather be tending the flowers....

I always

rather be doing that

but when I involve God

the stress of deciding what to do slips away

He brings me before the plant He needs tending to

in the moment (for me)

and He has perfect directions

knows how to get to the root of a weed

with the least trouble

so now when I feel myself going there

without Him

and poking around in the various plots

in this gigantic garden of thought

and feel myself becoming overwhelmed

feel myself becoming consumed

or drawn toward a part

that could really hurt me

if I went there myself

maybe a part that

God would not have me go to yet

and I catch myself then

I default to God's plan

I rely on Him to show me

and in the moment I turn to Him

and grab his hand

and instead

step into the garden WITH Him

in that moment

there is peace

there is a knowing

that no matter how out of control

the garden will ever look to me

no matter what it seems

to my meager human eye

what GOD always sees is bigger

always brighter

filled with sunshine and roses

and daisies and posies

He sees it finished

He sees it at its best

and His best for me includes fewer weeds

a plan to tend to the garden so efficiently

that it can then

help itself

it defaults to memories of love

that bloom far more often

with the help of His miracle grow....

so invite God into the garden of your mind

Let Him show you what He has planned

Let him prune and fertilize and weed with you

so you can be at peace in a place

He meant

for GOOD.

~C